carrying the question

Watching the people in a city like Munich, one could easily get the impression, that everyone knows, what he or she wants. Listening to the colleagues´ chat during lunch break, you also rather get, what they have done or are planning to do, and they appear convinced, decided. Having no answer on a current personal topic makes us talk to friends, parents, consultants, coaches, etc. and all of them again convey the message of them “knowing” but not oneself. This triggers quickly a whole chain reaction of thoughts, which questions our whole being and finally makes no use of the potential of the question and of oneself.

Quiet to easily we miss to see that in our society it is simply not “fancy” to have a question. It is still more acceptable to be clear, to know, to be decided. And this paradigm encircles us also in cases , in which it would be more authentic, more appropriate and even more fruitful to have a question rather than an answer.

We tend to underestimate the effect of “being pregnant” with a question and we interpret it wrongly as incompetence or powerlessness. The opposite is the case:  It´s a high competence to be able to stand the unsolved situation for the sake of the true solution and not go into the avoidance pattern of pseudo solutions (strength, pragmatic, simplicity, etc.). There is a lot happening during the phase of the unsolved question: We focus our attention, we condense the question to its true core, we relate it to new and other experiences and encounters, etc. This is an extremely valuable process.

Do you allow yourself to have a question without an answer?

Which of your questions deserves to be “carried around as pregnancy”?